Huge Turning Point In My Life

In the last year, I’ve consumed a lot right wing media.  And after seeing them make their case, they’ve convinced me.

I’ve become a member the Tea Party movement.  They’re right.  Obama is the worst President ever, including James Buchanan, who’s best known for failing to prevent the Civil War.  That’s right.  The last two years have been worse than the entire Civil War.

Obama’s support of corporations in the form of corporate bailouts does make him a socialist, Marxist, Communist, Progressive, leftist, Nazi, liberal.  That’s right, they’re all the same thing.  The leftists pretend those things are all different to confuse us true patriotic Americans with their fancy words with their fancy different meanings.

Obama is definitely Muslim.  Twenty years in a Christian church & having his children baptized Christian was just a dirty trick taught to him by his Muslim master, George Soros.  Yup, Soros is Muslim too.  Why else would he have helped the Nazi’s round up Jews?

Obamacare’s individual mandate for people to purchase health insurance from private companies is a government takeover of healthcare.  The fact that the new insurance will be managed and profited from by corporations is another of their sneaky liberal tricks.

I’ll be a fervent protector of the Second Amendment.  I will not rest until there is a bazooka in every child’s backpack.  Our children must be allowed to protect themselves.  With bazookas.

I now support our troops, because as we all know only the Tea Party supports our troops.  Liberals hate the troops.  That’s why they don’t want to let them be at war constantly.

I feel so much lighter now, without that burden to evaluate each situation independently based on their own merits.  It will be so much easier to jump straight to thinking the opposite of whatever I’ve been told to pretend all liberals think.  Although, I suppose that will even out by finally working for a living instead of being the lazy, tax leaching socialist I apparently was before today.

My television will only have one channel from now on.  Fox News.  They can tell me what to think from now on.  Then again, why do I need to bother watching?  Since I already know that Obama is always wrong about everything why do I need Fox News?